Friday 16 February 2018

Interpersonal Conflict (Draft #01) - revised 17.02.18




Communication is important to make an extra effort to talk to the person or people directly and then use intuition and logic to make sense of the whole thing. Thus, decisions cannot be made on just a partial information. This is something I have been exposed to after a conflict recently.
Just a month ago, I had a conflict with a colleague at work and trust was the main issue. She is a full timer in the company and holds a huge responsibility managing the store and part timers like myself. I was in school when her sister called me, saying that my colleague was sick and could not come to work. She has called the other part timers if they could replace her but to no avail. I could not replace her as my lessons were still ongoing in school. There were multiple times when she backed out from work at the last minute without any valid reason and almost everyone in the store is aware with this issue. Upon recalling this issue, I contacted her and demanded a reason for her absence, asking if she was really sick. In that instance, her sister responded back instead and insulted me for being inconsiderate and disrespectful towards my colleague's well-being. She added on to insult negatively and curse at me in which I felt offended and disgusted at her behaviour. It turns out to be true that my colleague was indeed sick with proof of medical certificate of two days, after which I felt bad with the whole situation. I made the assumption that she was lying as she backed out from work too often that I was not able to trust her anymore.

After reading through my conflict, what will you do if you were in my position?

(299 words)

Commented on:
Dina's, Jasmine's, Neng's
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11 comments:

  1. Thanks, Angela, for sharing. There are a few areas that are not clear to me. Who is the boss? Why were you called, and why was your suspicion relevant?

    You are supposed to ask for advice on how to resolve the conflict. Finding fault is not so important, is it?

    I look forward to reading your classmates' responses.

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    Replies
    1. Hello Brad, thank you for taking the time to read my post! I will take note of the pointers and make neccesary amendments to it.

      Cheers!

      Delete
  2. Hey Angie! Thanks for sharing your conflict with us. I understand that it is difficult to trust someone who has constantly cancelled on work last minute with no valid reason. However, I believe that we should try to give the benefit of doubt and not jump into conclusions. It could have been your tone when you questioned her sister that ticked her off, but I think that you did not deserve the insult as well. My suggestion is to try to be the bigger person and know that you were just doing your job! :)

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    Replies
    1. Hello Jas!
      Thank you for the encouragement! I will try to be the best that I can! ^.^

      Delete
  3. Hey Angie!

    Thank you for sharing.

    I do agree with you that sometimes, in a workplace, there may be some people whom are always absent even when they are supposed to turn up for work. This may cause inconvenience to the rest of the staff, as there is a shortage of manpower.

    For your case, I understand that you may be angry because the person whom you are referring to, always backs out from work last minute. If I were in your shoes, I would also not believe the excuse given as it happens way too often. However, I do feel that maybe you could have asked the sister in a nicer way so as to not sound so demanding. I do believe that you don’t deserve to be insulted either, as you have the rights to ask her why.

    Hopefully you were able to resolve this issue and learn from this situation, so that it won’t happen again in the long run.

    Cheers!

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    Replies
    1. Hi Dina!
      I do agree with your point! Thank you for empathising me!
      Cheers! ^.^

      Delete
  4. Hi Angela,

    Thank you for sharing your experience.
    I understand that there will always be people whom pull outs due to their own personal issues or gains. However, it is bad to give a judgement before knowing the truth. Normally, I would have tried to source for the truth before I made any conclusion. It is better to give the benefit of doubt even though the person is a repeated offender. I believed it might been your tone in your message. My message would not have included this part " asking if she was really sick." However, what done is done, I would apologize for my misunderstanding.

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    Replies
    1. Hello Neng,
      Thank you for taking the time to read! I agree that my tone was a tad too harsh. I will take note of that in the future!
      Cheers,
      Angela

      Delete
  5. Hi Angie,

    I understand your scenario it’s really hard not to doubt someone that constantly gives excuses. I would apologize to her sister and explain that I’m not being rude and that I just wish to clarify and if she’s sick, stay home. I think the tone in the call is the main reason that caused this conflict.

    Cheers
    Hong Kiat

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  6. Hi Hong Kiat,
    Yes I do agree that my tone may be a little too harsh. Thank you for taking the time to read my post!

    Cheers, Angela

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  7. Thanks everyone for commenting on my post.
    My conflict was solved through making another call to my colleague. Subsequently, I apologised to her for being harsh. I explained to her the reason why I was triggered over her absence, she apologised for leading me to feel this way about her work ethics. Also, she was upset with my behaviour. Unfortunately, she did not change her work ethics after the conflict. To date, we do not talk or communicate with each other already. It is a pity that this had happened, but she will move on with her life and I will move on with mine.

    Cheers,
    Angela

    ReplyDelete